Tag: Mormon

Utah Porn Filters Censor Governor Spencer Cox

After former Governor Gary Herbert and Senator Todd Weiler deemed Pornography a “Public Health Crisis” measures were put in place to block porn from reaching Utahns. After legislation failed and the administrations censorship aspirations fizzled out, filters remained active and are going haywire. Current Governor Spencer Cox found himself caught in his own web this […]

Irish Setters Protest Mitt Romney At The Utah State Capitol

Salt Lake City, Utah- Thousands of Irish Setters showed up at the State Capitol to voice their opposition of Mitt Romney’s Senate seat ambititions. Utah has already projected that he’ll win buy a landslide. Romney has a lot of support from the LDS community in Utah. It’s inivetable that he will replace Orrin Hatch after […]

Gary Herbert makes it illegal to deny that popcorn pops on the apricot trees

Salt Lake City, Utah- New legislation just passed making it illegal to deny that popcorn pops on apricot trees. Next spring when the apricot trees are in full bloom. You would be able to call the beautiful flowers “Blossoms” anymore. Well, at least in Utah. You will have to refered the white blossoms as “Popcorn.” […]

Life Discovered On The Moon, Mormons Dispatch Missionaries

Washington DC- Donald Trump announced on Friday that NASA has discovered intelligent life on the Moon.   Donald Trump has not been a traditional US president. Many have wondered if UFO disclosure was on the table. Five species of aliens were discovered. The greys were the dominate species on the planet. “A video of a […]

Mormons To Build LDS Temple On Mars

Mars- The Church Of Jesus Christ Of Latter Day Saints just announced that they will be building an LDS temple on Mars. On Monday morning, the church plans on launching a super rover named “FAITH.” The super Droid was built at BYU’s robotics department.     “We named this robot ‘Faith’ because Faith will move […]

Utah issues first baby DUI

Salt Lake City, Utah- A crazed baby on fermented breast milk, led Utah Highway Patrol, Bountiful, West Bountiful, Woods Cross, North Salt Lake and Salt Lake Police Departments on a slow speed chase today. West Bountiful Police got a report of a billegerent baby urinating in the sand box at a West Bountiful Park. When […]

Valentine’s Day: Special Report

(February 2017 — Salt Lake City, UT) If you’re looking for the sweetest spot to be on this day for lovers, you couldn’t find a better place than Mormon country. A University of Kansas study, released last week, rated Mormon men as the most potent in the country. As part of a survey of several […]

Tupac live at The Salt Lake Tabernacle

That’s right, Tupac Shakur is back, and he’s ready to throw down in Utah’s most notorious venues, with the worlds most holy of choirs. Tickets are just $25 Kids seats are still only 5 buuuuuuuuucks!!!! The 128th ward relief society will be providing spaghetti and lemonade for the first 25 people! Blessings will be offered […]